Ever wonder who my favorite comedian of all time would be? For stand-up, no one could beat Steven Wright:
A friend of mine once sent me a postcard with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, ‘Wish you were here.’.
Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
I think I’ve forgotten this before.
What’s another word for Thesaurus?
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, ‘Did you sleep good?’ I said ‘No, I made a few mistakes.’
( Refresh the page for 5 more random Steven Wright quotes. )