Ever wonder who my favorite comedian of all time would be? For stand-up, no one could beat Steven Wright:
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
The other day I… uh, no, that wasn’t me.
If you can’t hear me, it’s because I’m in parentheses.
OK, so what’s the speed of dark?
My neighbor has a circular driveway… he can’t get out.
( Refresh the page for 5 more random Steven Wright quotes. )